More Ramblings - Tiger Woods, Olympics, Hatred and Angst

Hello Everyone,
It's an interesting week. The Olympics are underway in Vancouver, the media is all over how the Canadians say "eh," Tiger Woods has apologized, a man flew a plane into a building in Austin, TX and killed himself and another in the process. I'm sure that somewhere out there, there's celebrity news as well .. I'm just not tuned in.

About the Olympics. I know people love them, but I have some thoughts on reinventing our views and beliefs about them. It's a concern to me that we spend millions of dollars on fireworks and gala events in a time when the world is in distress. How many people could we feed with that money. I so admire the young people who devote their lives to their skill training and put their body, souls and heart into it. It's grueling and often their childhood is put on hold. I worry about them. Then, when they come in 4th and don't get a medal, it's like their life is over. I'd love to find some ways to honor even getting to the Olympics and being better than 99.9% of the population. When are people every "good enough?" And how can we honor that without making it about being #1, 2 or 3?

About Tiger Woods. I think it took real guts for him to come out this week and apologize so publically. He was definitely a different Tiger at that podium. Now, the media is tearing apart whether he was apologetic enough. Who are they to say? I saw an interview this morning with an "Apology expert." She gave him an A- pretty darn good. Let's reinvent how we love to knock people off their pedestal when they show a "human side." Do I approve of what Tiger did? No. Is it my business what he did? No. It's between he and his wife ... and in this case, his sponsors. The therapist in me (I was one for 30 years) says... "there but for the grace of God go I." No one is exempt from mistakes, addictions and bad judgement. History is filled with them. It's how we learn and grow.

About Joseph Stack. A man builds up incredible anger and angst at the IRS and the government. I'm sure many of us have had feelings like that before. He, who appeared normal to those around him, obviously was teetering on the brink, simmering under the surface and then, seemingly "lost it." I feel incredible sadness for him and his family. And, having lived in Austin (in fact I lived less than 1/2 mile down the road from that building).. I'm sad for the residents of that great city. Although this was not a "terrorist" act, the site of an airplane into a building will bring back any post-traumatic shock anyone has had of a scene like this in the past. I'm sure that was intentional on Mr. Stack's part. What if that was avoidable? What if the powers that be could have responded to him in a different way? What if the government could be compassionate to people and listen and be helpful? Now that would be a major reinvention.

Personally, I went to the Dept. of Motor Vehicles this week in NY. I wanted to trade in my TX driver's license for my NY license .. and yes, finally become a resident of NY. The woman at the information desk handed me a form, told me to come back when I had my passport or birth certificate and my SS card. She never looked at me, and she certainly didn't want any further questions. She was on to "next." What if we reinvented this world to a place where people come from their hearts and their desire to be helpful ... and all people they served felt honored and assisted. Now that would be a reinvented attitude at work.

That's what I do. I'm the reinvention hotshot ... working with companies to reinvent their culture into one that cares about their employees and customers.
Thanks for reading.
As always, your comments are invited.

Some Ramblings (not so pleasant) About ReInvention

Rambling #1 -- Vday

Well, it's the day after Valentine's Day ... and I survived. Why do I say that? Well, I would love to see Valentine's Day (an invented holiday) either removed from the list or ReInvented to include just LOVE for all mankind. By making VDay (as I like to call it) about romance, it causes more pain than glory. Let me explain.

First, there shouldn't be only one day expressly set for people to honor their one and only love. I think that might best be done daily. And, what about spontaneously? When I was married, I loved it when my husband brought me flowers for no reason at all (although some of my friends assumed the worst .. that he maybe was guilty for something.)

Second, by suggesting that Vday is all about romance and love and sex ... it hurts many people who are dealing with 1) an unhappy relationship with a significant other and the hypocrisy of being honored that one day when many other days are lousy. 2) the loneliness of not having a significant other and feeling totally sad about that and not wanting it in your face. 3) the sadness of having lost their love, as in being widowed, divorced, etc.

If, on the other hand, we make Vday a day to love everyone ... then it's about acceptance, appreciation for our co-workers, our children, our friends. Yes, I know, there are cards for that and a slight inclination ... but truly, it's all about diamonds and flowers and dinner for two.

Let's reinvent that.

Rambling #2 -- Holidays
Let's also consider reinventing our relationship to honoring holidays in another way. In this day and age, a holiday is merely an excuse to 1) Not go to work (think of all the people that hate their jobs and actually WANT a day off to not work). 2) An opportunity for shopping and commercialism -- everyone is home today, let's sucker them for all they can or cannot afford to spend on their credit cards.

You see, many holidays could be seen as sacred and significant. Think of today .. we are celebrating and honoring Presidents Lincoln and Washington ... exactly HOW does that relate to shopping and spending money?

Here's where I date myself. When I was a kid... stores were actually ALL closed on Christmas, Thanksgiving, New Year's Day, Fourth of July, etc. The people who worked in retail actually got that day off and the reasons for the holidays were ever-present ... there were events to celebrate the value of the day, to be with loved ones. Now, probably only Christmas and Thanksgiving honor that.. maybe Easter.

I bet if you were to ask the typical woman/man on the street what today means and why it's a holiday, they couldn't tell you. That's sad.

Let's reinvent this.

Rambling #3 -- Reinvention is NOT to be feared.
Some people hear the word ReInvention and totally freak out. I actually have people say "I can't come to your reinvention workshop .. I'm way to scared." I wonder what they are scared about. I'm not going to suggest they prance naked through the streets. I'm just suggesting that each and everyone of us take a day (or whatever amount of time) to look at our lives and inquire into where we might "tweak it" .. where it's working, where it's not and how we might remedy that. Beyond that, I might suggest each one of us start becoming the person we are meant to be. One of my favorite sayings (yes, mine) is: Stop ripping off the world and be who you are meant to be.

ReInventing is about little steps .. it's not about doing everything completely different between this moment and the next. It's incremental. When we die, don't we want to feel like we reeealllly lived? I don't know about you .. but I'm not willing to settle for how it's always been (the status quo). I don't think you want to either.

Let's reinvent our relationship with ReInvention.

So. thanks for letting me ramble on this President's Day holiday. It's 11:30 in the morning, I'm still in my pajamas. Of course, I work at home, so I'm often in my pajamas half way through the day. I'm lucky -- don't have to get up and go to work each morning. If that annoys you .. then, hey, you too can have it if you're willing to give up the daily grind, take a risk, leap and reinvent.

Happy Holiday Monday

Stay the Same .. or Take ACTION .. The notion of Different!

On my website, at www.annfry.com I have the following quote: Wanting things to be different and doing what it takes to make things different are two different things!

We all wake up everyday, and during the course of that day, we have thoughts about how things are, how they're going, what's working, what's not ... in other words, we think many times a day about what we want to be different. We are seldom okay with how things are.

We can want things to be different -- we can wish and hope... but making things different .. now that is a much more challenging call. We want .. but do we have the guts, or will we take the time, or can we figure out the how, etc.

We hear people complaining about the government all the time ... criticizing and ranting and blaming. But, actually, what do they then DO to change what they don't like? It's all about ACTION. Ask yourself .. Am I someone who takes action? Or do I sit back and dream about it all, but do nothing? Tell the truth.

I might be the reinvention hotshot, but first and foremost, I'm a human being. I, like many of you, will wish and hope and then sit back and take NO action. Why? In my case, I get hooked into the "I don't know how." place. I spin my wheels, over think it, whine, doubt, etc. I ask everyone else what I need to do or should do. I weigh all the options ... ad nauseum. Eventually, I'll get sick and tired enough of not taking any action and will then do something.
For example. I've been needing to upgrade the content on my website for a long time. I've thought about it. I've printed out the old and carried it with me to make some upgrades, but yet, I didn't. Well, today, I had a burst of energy and just did it. It took about an hour to cut an paste and edit. My webmaster was working, so when I shot it all off to her, she got it done and up immediately. Wow! Weeks of NOT doing got done in an hour. That's ACTION.

Another thing to consider about not taking action ... we get to sit in a space of laziness, fear, aggravation. We get to be slugs. We get to be righteous about how no one is calling us, or using our services, etc. We blame others for our lack of work or whatever it might be. If the truth be known, however, it's US... our not doing anything.

We just get used to the status quo .. to staying where we are, doing the same old thing, whining and complaining about it. Sometimes, the circumstances can be overwhelming and we really don't know what to do OR it seems there's nothing to do.
NOTE: REInvention is NOT easy ... it's scary, demanding, challenging. It takes time and energy and perseverence and guts. It's not for the weak. Give yourself lots of nurturing attention and reassurance and pats on the back as you make progress. Take some down time, yell and scream and get frustrated.. and then, get back on the horse and keep riding forward.

The ACTION will lead to the change you want (eventually). Your life will be different AND it will take some getting used to ... AND it will be better than before if you acknowledge it and appreciate it.

So, stay where you are or take ACTION for things to be different. It's all up to you and you get to choose.
Happy ReInventing.